I got called out last night. I must say I don’t particularly care for getting called out, but who does. Josh and I had just left book club, and we were sitting in his apartment parking lot talking about all of the things we had just heard. Somehow our conversation went from African poverty, starvation, and violence to Bates Park. I guess it’s not too hard to see how that occurred. This year of Twister has been a hard one for me. I didn’t feel connected, I kind of felt like an outcast in my own ministry, and lost, not knowing what to do with my passion for these kids and this neighborhood that burns inside of me. All of these wounds and hard ministry times this year I realized last night, were mostly self-inflected. It all became very evident when I was talking about it, and Josh said “well, you haven’t been engaged this year, that’s what needs to change” ummm…what?? Immediately in my lovely human nature my defensive side came out, but luckily it was only quietly in my mind. That only lasted about one minute, and then I broke down crying. He was right. Where have I been this year? I have no idea. I know where I have not been. I have not been engaged in the lives of the kids and people God has placed around me. I have not been even engaged in twister and the lessons, and the games, or even simply just loving these kids that are there every Sunday.
My role in twister has always been a hard one for me to come to terms with. I am gifted very differently than Sarah and the others that have been a part of the ministry. I’m not a teacher, and that is okay, but it gets hard for me to know how to fit into a ministry that is filled with teaching. This winter I am bound and determined to do some searching, do some talking with people much smarter than me, do some listening, and figure out how I can be the most effective person I can be in the ministry field that God has called me into.
I know for a fact he has called me, so he has a plan for me.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
The way I see it #293
The way I see it
Isn't necessarily
The way you see it
Or the way it is
Or ought to be
What's more important
Is that were all
Looking for it
And a way to see it.
My starbucks advice for the day.
Isn't necessarily
The way you see it
Or the way it is
Or ought to be
What's more important
Is that were all
Looking for it
And a way to see it.
My starbucks advice for the day.
Thursday, August 28, 2008
The Unmentionable
There are two things that we are not supposed to talk about in normal social situations, politics and religion. I personally like to push the boundaries and talk about both of them.
The whole blog has been dedicated to showing Jesus Christ, the real side of Christianity, not just religion. In this post I’m going to push the boundaries of politics.
This election could possibly be the most important election in our history. I know that has been said so many times in the last year, but we are at a crossroads. I believe whole heartedly is “hope” and “change” BUT I do not believe in Barack Obama or pretty much anything that comes out of his eloquently spoken mouth.
What I do believe in is the Americans peoples right to live and breath, safely. Has anyone noticed that sense 9/11 we have not been attacked once on our own soil?
I believe in the right for Americans to make as much money as they want, if they work for it honestly and ethically. Why does wealth have to be distributed? People work hard for their money, why should they have to pay for others to live? I understand that it’s our job as Christians to take care of others. But that’s exactly it, its our job as CHRISTIANS, it is not the governments job to take our money and redistribute it as they feel necessary. Barack has a plan called the world Poverty Act, where he would take 845 Billion for U.S. taxpayers and redistribute the money. I was reading about redistributing wealth today, and I came across this great example of how ridiculous this sounds. What if we decided that it is just crazy that Michael Phelps won 8 gold medals, and he is being very greedy with his gold medals, so we decided to take some of them away from him, and distribute them to “less fortunate” athletes. Or if we decided the New England Patriots had won too many super bowls, and they don’t need to win all those super bowls, so we need to give the super bowl trophy to another team. Makes no sense, right?
I do not think that we should have to pay for everyone’s healthcare. Once again, see above. Nationalized healthcare doesn’t work. Ask Canada. The guy who invented the healthcare system in Canada admits that it is in crisis. He now wants private sector to take back over, and he wants people to be able to exercise their freedom of choice.
Read about it here: http://www.glennbeck.com/content/articles/article/198/11886/
I believe that every law-abiding citizen should have the right to carry a gun. It is a proven fact that in cities where the guns have been taken away, the crime rate is the highest. The criminals who steal the guns are not going to be affected by the gun ban, they will find a way to still get the guns, but the law abiding citizens who have the gun to protect themselves and their families will be in jeopardy.
I do not believe in dependency on foreign oil when we have the resources. I think that anwr is the greatest example of this. We have been brain washed in believing that the oil companies want to steal all of our money and destroy our environment. That is simply not true and nothing but political propaganda. In Anwr only 2000 acres are going to be used for the permanent infrastructure. There is virtually NO chance the environment will be harmed. I know that we have been told it will destroy the beautiful land. Take a look at the picture below, which is where they want to drill! I don’t see lush lands, and animals roaming around awaiting their death from the evil oil companies. I know that is has been said that there will be no relief for 10 years if we drill. When Bush just mentioned the word “drill” the price of oil dropped 25 dollars a barrel! Now for the profits of the oil companies. According to the tax foundation for 1977-2004 big oil made 643 Billion in profits BUT during the same span Federal and State Governments made 1.343 Trillion in tax revenues FROM big oil.
Anwr:
I’m not convinced that we are on the brink of global warming, and that is just not my opinion, that is the opinion of many scientists.
I believe the surge is working. Violence against U.S. troops is down 80 percent. Violence against Iraq civilians is down 70 percent. We have turned over more and more provinces to Iraqi control. Iraqi economy is being rebuilt. Guess what? If the surge is working, which it is, that means it is now possible to start withdrawing U.S. troops from Iraq. Isn’t that what everyone really wants?
I believe we need to get the illegal immigrants out of this country. We need to do what is right for this country. 20 million people have broken the laws of citizenship. They are breaking the law! Would the government turn and look the other way if you or I were breaking the laws? Illegal aliens represent about 4-5 percent of our workforce; our unemployment figure is just over 5 percent. What does that tell you? If we get the illegal immigrants out of here they will be replaced with citizens who need those jobs. Not to mention the violence on the border is out of control. There are many drug smugglers and criminals doing everything they can to get over the border, which includes holding our military at gunpoint just to get across. In a study done in 2005 55,322 illegal aliens were researched, and they found that they were arrested at least a total of 459,614 times. I have no problem with legal immigrates at all, but we need to keep our country safe.
Wow, this got long. Just my opinion of course.:)
The whole blog has been dedicated to showing Jesus Christ, the real side of Christianity, not just religion. In this post I’m going to push the boundaries of politics.
This election could possibly be the most important election in our history. I know that has been said so many times in the last year, but we are at a crossroads. I believe whole heartedly is “hope” and “change” BUT I do not believe in Barack Obama or pretty much anything that comes out of his eloquently spoken mouth.
What I do believe in is the Americans peoples right to live and breath, safely. Has anyone noticed that sense 9/11 we have not been attacked once on our own soil?
I believe in the right for Americans to make as much money as they want, if they work for it honestly and ethically. Why does wealth have to be distributed? People work hard for their money, why should they have to pay for others to live? I understand that it’s our job as Christians to take care of others. But that’s exactly it, its our job as CHRISTIANS, it is not the governments job to take our money and redistribute it as they feel necessary. Barack has a plan called the world Poverty Act, where he would take 845 Billion for U.S. taxpayers and redistribute the money. I was reading about redistributing wealth today, and I came across this great example of how ridiculous this sounds. What if we decided that it is just crazy that Michael Phelps won 8 gold medals, and he is being very greedy with his gold medals, so we decided to take some of them away from him, and distribute them to “less fortunate” athletes. Or if we decided the New England Patriots had won too many super bowls, and they don’t need to win all those super bowls, so we need to give the super bowl trophy to another team. Makes no sense, right?
I do not think that we should have to pay for everyone’s healthcare. Once again, see above. Nationalized healthcare doesn’t work. Ask Canada. The guy who invented the healthcare system in Canada admits that it is in crisis. He now wants private sector to take back over, and he wants people to be able to exercise their freedom of choice.
Read about it here: http://www.glennbeck.com/content/articles/article/198/11886/
I believe that every law-abiding citizen should have the right to carry a gun. It is a proven fact that in cities where the guns have been taken away, the crime rate is the highest. The criminals who steal the guns are not going to be affected by the gun ban, they will find a way to still get the guns, but the law abiding citizens who have the gun to protect themselves and their families will be in jeopardy.
I do not believe in dependency on foreign oil when we have the resources. I think that anwr is the greatest example of this. We have been brain washed in believing that the oil companies want to steal all of our money and destroy our environment. That is simply not true and nothing but political propaganda. In Anwr only 2000 acres are going to be used for the permanent infrastructure. There is virtually NO chance the environment will be harmed. I know that we have been told it will destroy the beautiful land. Take a look at the picture below, which is where they want to drill! I don’t see lush lands, and animals roaming around awaiting their death from the evil oil companies. I know that is has been said that there will be no relief for 10 years if we drill. When Bush just mentioned the word “drill” the price of oil dropped 25 dollars a barrel! Now for the profits of the oil companies. According to the tax foundation for 1977-2004 big oil made 643 Billion in profits BUT during the same span Federal and State Governments made 1.343 Trillion in tax revenues FROM big oil.
Anwr:
I’m not convinced that we are on the brink of global warming, and that is just not my opinion, that is the opinion of many scientists.
I believe the surge is working. Violence against U.S. troops is down 80 percent. Violence against Iraq civilians is down 70 percent. We have turned over more and more provinces to Iraqi control. Iraqi economy is being rebuilt. Guess what? If the surge is working, which it is, that means it is now possible to start withdrawing U.S. troops from Iraq. Isn’t that what everyone really wants?
I believe we need to get the illegal immigrants out of this country. We need to do what is right for this country. 20 million people have broken the laws of citizenship. They are breaking the law! Would the government turn and look the other way if you or I were breaking the laws? Illegal aliens represent about 4-5 percent of our workforce; our unemployment figure is just over 5 percent. What does that tell you? If we get the illegal immigrants out of here they will be replaced with citizens who need those jobs. Not to mention the violence on the border is out of control. There are many drug smugglers and criminals doing everything they can to get over the border, which includes holding our military at gunpoint just to get across. In a study done in 2005 55,322 illegal aliens were researched, and they found that they were arrested at least a total of 459,614 times. I have no problem with legal immigrates at all, but we need to keep our country safe.
Wow, this got long. Just my opinion of course.:)
Monday, July 28, 2008
the lawn chair lady
So after work today I was driving down 141 making my daily trek back to grimes. Off the side of the interstate there was a lady sitting next to a department of transportation car in a lawn chair. I laughed and did a double take. How odd, a women on the side of the road looking as if she is laying out at the beach. I thought, I know who will love this. I picked up my phone to call sarah ann. Danget. She is across the world in moldova. I miss my friend. I must say that lately I have been quite proud of my friends. Sarah and rob answered gods call and made the trip across the world to serve the people of moldova, and phillip harder made the journey to africa. They are taking it to the ends of the earth and I am so proud. I don't know what the lawn chair lady was doing, im sure she had some sort of a purpose, but that will for sure be one of the things I tell sarah about when she gets home.
Bigger than my heart
1 John 3:18-23 (the message)
My dear children let's not just talk about love; let's practice real love. This is the only way we'll know we're living truly, living in God's reality. It's also the way to shut down debilitating self-criticism, even when there is something to it. For God is greater than our worried hearts and knows more about us than we do ourselves. And friends, once that's taken care of and we're no longer accusing or condemning ourselves, we're bold and free before God! We're able to stretch our hands out and receive what we asked for because we're doing what he said, doing what pleases him.
I have been reading 1 John, Over and Over and Over again. Sometimes I do this until it finally sinks in. I have probably read the above passage about 30 times in the last week. Those who know me know that I am incredibly critically hard on myself, or debilitating as the message so eloquently puts it. Every time I have gotten worried or scared over the last week I just keep repeating to myself. “God is bigger than our hearts” That is so amazing to me. Especially right now. Katie recently laid in the grasp of death, I was so scared for her, for her family, for our church, but “ God is bigger than our hearts” He proved to me, and to so many others, that if we just let go for a second and pray and “Stretch out our hands, we will receive what we ask for,” HEALING. “Because we are doing what he said”
I want to live in Gods reality. I want to practice real love. I want to shut down the self-criticism, even when there is something to it. Good thing that God is so much bigger than my worried heart, and I don’t have to do a single thing really. Just believe, love, stretch out my hands, and receive.
Beautiful.
My dear children let's not just talk about love; let's practice real love. This is the only way we'll know we're living truly, living in God's reality. It's also the way to shut down debilitating self-criticism, even when there is something to it. For God is greater than our worried hearts and knows more about us than we do ourselves. And friends, once that's taken care of and we're no longer accusing or condemning ourselves, we're bold and free before God! We're able to stretch our hands out and receive what we asked for because we're doing what he said, doing what pleases him.
I have been reading 1 John, Over and Over and Over again. Sometimes I do this until it finally sinks in. I have probably read the above passage about 30 times in the last week. Those who know me know that I am incredibly critically hard on myself, or debilitating as the message so eloquently puts it. Every time I have gotten worried or scared over the last week I just keep repeating to myself. “God is bigger than our hearts” That is so amazing to me. Especially right now. Katie recently laid in the grasp of death, I was so scared for her, for her family, for our church, but “ God is bigger than our hearts” He proved to me, and to so many others, that if we just let go for a second and pray and “Stretch out our hands, we will receive what we ask for,” HEALING. “Because we are doing what he said”
I want to live in Gods reality. I want to practice real love. I want to shut down the self-criticism, even when there is something to it. Good thing that God is so much bigger than my worried heart, and I don’t have to do a single thing really. Just believe, love, stretch out my hands, and receive.
Beautiful.
Friday, July 18, 2008
Prayer... Prayer....Prayer......
This morning my phone rang at 5am and it was Rob. He said that Davy's (an elder in our church)wife katie had a brain anerurysm this morning. I believe she is currently out of surgery now. I'm not sure what the outcome is. Just please pray for her, for healing, for her family. They are very much adored in our church, and by everyone who meets them.
For more updates read mere's blog http://confessionsofaslackermom.blogspot.com/
Thanks for the prayers.
For more updates read mere's blog http://confessionsofaslackermom.blogspot.com/
Thanks for the prayers.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Happy.
I am so happy lately. I cant really explain it. I have never really ever been this happy. Currently I am on a VBS high. We are having VBS at Bates Park this week, and I think that has a lot to do with my newfound joy. I cant even begin to explain the feeling that I have when I'm at that park. Every time before I step into that grass I pray "God empty me and fill me with you, so I can spill out on these kids" I wonder if that has something to do with it? Im guessing that would be a yes. I wish that was my life. I wish that was all I could do. I wish i could just pour myself into this neighborhood constintly. My office job is much easier, much nicer, but I am much happier there. I am just so incredibly blessed, in every area of my life. I do not deserve so many good things, but God has given them to me. I have been reading Job lately. I wonder what I would be like if I got them all taken away? If all my family left me, If all my friends decided not to waste their time on my ever changing emotions, If Twister failed, If 2 Rivers crashed and burned, if Josh decided that it was just to hard and too much work to be with this irrational girl.Would I be so happy then? Would I still have this joy. Oh, I would like to think so. No matter what, there is NOTHING that can ever sepearte me from the one that makes my heart beat like this. The one that makes his love pour out of me. No matter what, HE will never leave me. I learned that at VBS this week. :)
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