Happy.

I am so happy lately. I cant really explain it. I have never really ever been this happy. Currently I am on a VBS high. We are having VBS at Bates Park this week, and I think that has a lot to do with my newfound joy. I cant even begin to explain the feeling that I have when I'm at that park. Every time before I step into that grass I pray "God empty me and fill me with you, so I can spill out on these kids" I wonder if that has something to do with it? Im guessing that would be a yes. I wish that was my life. I wish that was all I could do. I wish i could just pour myself into this neighborhood constintly. My office job is much easier, much nicer, but I am much happier there. I am just so incredibly blessed, in every area of my life. I do not deserve so many good things, but God has given them to me. I have been reading Job lately. I wonder what I would be like if I got them all taken away? If all my family left me, If all my friends decided not to waste their time on my ever changing emotions, If Twister failed, If 2 Rivers crashed and burned, if Josh decided that it was just to hard and too much work to be with this irrational girl.Would I be so happy then? Would I still have this joy. Oh, I would like to think so. No matter what, there is NOTHING that can ever sepearte me from the one that makes my heart beat like this. The one that makes his love pour out of me. No matter what, HE will never leave me. I learned that at VBS this week. :)

2 RC/ Twister

So this week we wrapped it up. We have been in Ezra and Nehimiah for the last four months of church, and the series is officially over. I must say, I had my doubts. How could I ever learn anything from those books that I never really even dared to skim over, but it was pretty mcuh life changing. God worked on my heart, rebuilding, as we like to refer to it at 2RC.

Yesterday Rob just talked about finishing the race. We are young, we have a long ways to go. We need to finish strong. Also Christianity is a RELATIONSHIP not a product. We are not selling God to people. Jesus is not a fix all. The words "if you accpet him your life will be perfect" couldnt be further from the truth. Its a relationship. A real one. With ups and downs, highs and lows, feeling distance, and feeling amazing love, feeling frusturated and hopeful all at one.

He encouraged us to stick with the changes that went along with the rebuilding process in our hearts. I have been working on it.

The things I'm working on....

Having confidence in Christ. My worth is in in him.

Remaining in christ. That is the only way anything I ever do will be succesful. Since Josh and I started waking up early to read. Things have began to change in me. I feel like my roots are going deeper in God,and I cant wait to see where this takes me.

Having ONE God.

Confession. asking for forgivness daily. Searching my heart, and asking God to point things out to me.

Speaking of confession, I said I wasnt going to drink a few blog enteries ago. Well I had a couple this weekend. Its okay though, it was just for a time. Plus I put my family history on ME. It is not MINE. I DO NOT have a drinking problem. My parents DO. I must find a balance. I cannot feel bad for what THEY do.

Enough about that...

Twister is awesome. I adore it. Thing are going great.

6 Months...10 things....

Josh and I have officially been together for 6 months. So i have decided to make a top ten list of all the great things about him. Seemed appropriate since I hardly talk about him on this thing, and I do adore him.

First off. I have a secret, a confession of sorts. I like country music. a lot. I think the boyfriend did something to me because now when i hear dierks bentley, or carrie underwood I get so happy. Sometimes I even clap, and those who really know me, know that is only reserved for extra special songs.


Okay...here we go....

10. He sings every country song to me.
9. When he looks me in the eyes he means it.
8. He lets me lose it on him one second, then he calms me down the next.
7. My family loves him.
6. He grabs my hand every time we pray.
5. He tickles me just to hear me laugh, because he likes to hear it that much.
4. He holds me accountable when no one else will.
3. He makes me call him every time I get home at night just to make sure I made it.
2. He calls me at 6am to make sure I'm up to work out and read my bible
1. He lets me completely be myself, and he still adores me.